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Jul 30 2015 15:54
Honeymoon life: before and after
Honeymoon lasts from a year to 2.5, the sociologists say.
Then the relations between newlyweds become more humdrum and trivial.
According to the average European couple, family idyll after the marriage lasts exactly two years, six months and 25 days. This phenomenon also has a special name - a true honeymoon. After that life, the honeymoon period is over and family relationship loses its charm and romanticism. After 2.5 years, the spouses begin to stale and perceive their marriage as normal state of things. As a result, a holiday atmosphere disappears; men spend more time on the couch watching TV instead of helping women to work around the house. In its turn, the woman pays less attention to what she wears at home.
The reason of a frequent disappointment after the honeymoon is high expectations. Young people face the need to adapt to each other, to seek compromises – and believe it or not, but for many of them it is a surprise. In addition, each has a family with its own traditions. Hardly anybody can without offending or suppressing a partner find a place for him and his habits. And if before and during the honeymoon all try to present themselves well, to say the least they can, after the honeymoon the partners see no need to do it anymore. Another unpleasant detail which appears after the wedding is the type of thinking "where now he (she) is going to go away." In this case the one partner adopts a laissez-faire attitude and the another stays with broken hopes.
We must understand that a beautiful wedding does not guarantee an equally beautiful life and instead of mad passion there will be calm relationships. And it is right, because the eternal holiday can not be the basis for strong relationships. They need another common denominator - stability, confidence in the partner, respect and the ability to discuss openly all unpleasant moments.
Life after the honeymoon, tips for couples:
Often the keeping of the family hearth lies heavily on the woman - this is understandable. Nature has mechanisms for creating a family, cozy and attractive life. The fact of how a woman will be able to be different, unpredictable and always exciting for her husband depends on many factors in the marriage. If a man is the breadwinner in the family, then the woman’s task is a hot dinner, beautifully decorated table and clean house.
Listening to each other - an indispensable skill in communication, which is recommended to have at everyone's finger tips. You can become indispensable for your spouse if you show respect for him, share his interests and listen to his views. But we should not lay all the responsibility on woman - division of responsibilities helps to keep the feelings that will not be destroyed by domestic problems.
It is also necessary to manage the family budget – a lot of families break up because of financial problems. One of the spouses should take the initiative and there will be less reasons for unpleasant conversations and scandals.
Sex life should be full of surprises. To avoid the feelings desensitization it is necessary to make an effort and show imagination and ingenuity. Please search for new sources of pleasure in sex as a guide for two - be open to experiments and trust each other as much as possible.
In the life of any couple there are times when the drawbacks of a beloved one begin to irritate and can materialize into a serious distortion. Take into account a good psychological method - evaluate the benefits and drawbacks. Time after time remind yourself what you like about your spouse, organize memorial evenings - review a record of your wedding, act out memorable moments of your honeymoon, organize dating, etc. Do not forget to plan for the future - common goals unite people and promote understanding.